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Proof Positive that ANYONE can Become a Good Writer


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I sent my two older kids to their first day of school this morning. There’s something exciting, albeit short-lived, about going back to school. My kids couldn’t sleep last night (and neither could I after dropping nearly $900 on school supplies and new clothes for three growing kids)!

It always reminds me of my own school days. Last weekend, we had a family get together at my brother’s house. My parents had found a box of my old school papers, including yearbooks and assignments I brought home. They presented me with this box of memories, and I found proof positive that anyone can become a good writer.

Let’s first take a look at me when I was about 9 years old, to set expectations appropriately:

Wendy's First Day of School

The dress I can handle:: sort of. You can’t see the wild hair in this reproduction, but UGH. And the workboots? Don’t ask, because I think I blocked it from my memory.

NOW, let’s take a look at some of the poems unearthed from my parents’ attic:

The Boy From Denver

There once was a boy from Denver
Who had a crush on Pam Henver
He picked up her math book
She gave him a bad look
And now he likes Dawn Tenver

Or perhaps this little ditty:

The Girl From France

There once was a girl from France
Who always wore jeans and tight pants
She looked at Dan,
And said, “Oh, Man!”
Now she is divorced with Vance

Oh, god, I’m laughing so hard I am having a hard time typing. But wait! It gets worse! And now, drrrruuummmm rrrrollllll please, for perhaps the worst poem of all time:


Pictures make you look so weird
They made my brother have a beard

My brother is only eight years old
And all my pictures are covered with mold

When the flash is wrong, your eyes are red
They also kill pesky bugs dead

They killed my favorite spider plant
‘Cause it wasn’t a nasty witches chant

We heard the chant on T.V. last night
And boy! It was really a fright!

I kid you not. Methinks I have just peed in my pants.

So there you go. From the bowels of Wendy Piersall’s writing history, I can now firmly say this is proof positive that if you think you write poorly, you are sorely mistaken after reading my early writings. Anything is better than this stuff!

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    On August 23rd, 2006 at 2:10 pm, said:

    I peed in my pants too.

    Here’s one of mine from I think 3rd grade:

    I found a small grey kitten
    I like to call her Mitten
    She cries meow
    Then eats her chow
    And hardly does any sittin’

    What were we thinking?!?!?!

    Thanks for making me laugh today :)


    On August 23rd, 2006 at 3:33 pm, eMom said:

    I swear to god, every time I have thought about this post today I have laughed out loud - again! This is hysterical, Jill! Thanks for adding to the tears of laughter! :D

    On August 23rd, 2006 at 4:40 pm, Brett Gillilan said:

    WOW! Experience the talent!



    On August 24th, 2006 at 12:31 am, Gattina said:

    Heee Heee Heee …. Gee that is really good ! I did that too but of course in german and it’s really amazing how good we were at that time ! Or could you write such funny stuff today ? And at that moment it wasn’t even funny to us !
    Do you have some more ? I like to have fun in the morning !

    On August 25th, 2006 at 8:32 am, cjcm said:

    He he..I wouldnt want to show mine…the first one that I tried to write…inspired by a song ‘Dont go Away’…ha ha ha I cant stop smiling from ears to ears.

    On August 25th, 2006 at 3:25 pm, eMom said:

    Gattina - I do have a few more, but they are just normal 9-year old poems about how pretty it is in the fall! Why don’t you translate your early German poems and post them on your blog? Send me a link if you do!!

    CJCM - glad to see you dropped by - again! Your post the other day was very kind - thanks! C’mon and share your Don’t Go Away poem - we have been laughing all week from bad poetry - the more, the merrier!

    On August 25th, 2006 at 4:46 pm, Terry Lloyd said:

    My son wrote one in 3rd grade and it was actually good!
    By Tyler Antrim
    Peace is being united with no hatred
    United is working together with peace.
    Working together means team work
    team work brings accomplishments
    Accomplishments make you proud and happy
    Being proud and happy means having peace…
    (Aren’t you happy I didn’t go over and over again?)
    Well, that’s the never ending cycle of a joyful life.
    Joyful means… … …
    I’m just kidding!!

    On August 25th, 2006 at 6:06 pm, eMom said:

    Terry - so wonderful of you to drop by! How did your garage sale go? And we missed you at the last mastermind meeting - REALLY missed you! See you in September! :)

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